Monday, October 24, 2005

Quality Television...

Clicking through the TV before heading off to sleep I came across CNN just as the hurricane of the week was blowing through south-Florida...I have to say that while you're not really learning ANYTHING from these idiots "braving" the storm it's great fun to watch...
It's like a new sport or something - Hurricane Reporting - and the teams are already broken down - CNN, FoxNews, the other people...it's great...
I've got two guys on a roof holding onto each other in their red-CNN team jackets while their homie is hangin' in the split screen out in some open grassland...basically just praying...literally holding on to a sign for a bit of leverage…
The camera swirls and we’ve lost the shot on the roof…wait, we’ve still got audio…
"He's fine he's fine," they say - "he's just adjusting, he'll be fine, just give us a minute."...
So we've lost CNN team1 and the lone member of team2 is borderline scared shitless and has given up his position...this should be negative points or something
...The best part is that the guy back in the studio is giving out directions to these poor bastards - FROM THE STUDIO! –priceless…
I guess he's like the coach...yeah that fits...
"You guys should really try and get to your fall back position..." he instructs them…
"No, No we're fin---sdlafjdslkajfsdkjfalsdjkfa (static)"
Team1 is down - are they throwing in the towel here?
"I think we may have to head inside..."
Coach just instructed them all to "take a 10minute break" too which they responded by with a weak "OK"
What's great is that every now and then these guys keep saying – “yeah I think this may be the worst of it right here” and then the signal goes out - you can't see or hear them so the coach just tries to go to the other team...What if one of these bastards blows away or gets diced up by some debris?
Coach don't care bitches - MUAHAHAHAHA!
This is great - coach is such a trip shouting instructions and asking "Am I gonna need to get you outta there?" I wish one of them would yell back - "yeah dickhead - come on down and get me outta here...you bastard..."
And then the inevitable coach moment – “Are you crying? ARE YOU CRYING? There’s no CRYING!... You make me sick!” followed by a thunderous bitch slap – talk about must-see-TV!

1 comment:

Apples said...
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